Thursday, August 19, 2010
I GOT HIV FROM A CHEATING BF SO I'M NOT GROSS
I was approached 3x this week on sex sites by guys who were recently diagnosed as a result of a cheating bf. 3 times. I was able to retrieve two of the profiles:
-Handsome sporty poz looking for similar guys or guys who can see past that
"Im a handsome sporty guy who happens to be positive because of a cheating bf. Ive been positive for a year and i take my meds so im undetectable. I'm looking for someone similar for a connection. I know there are others like me out there who are positive and feel like its hard to find normal guys in the same situation. Well here I am. More pix on demand."
-Good guys find me if you're out there
"Looking for loyal kind hearted people to have in my life. I am tired of the negativity that is involved in the normal dating scene. It seems most gay men have this sick affinity for hurting others, or for wanting to play "hard to get" dating games. Sometimes I feel like it is to much to just want to find someone to be with, who wants the best for me and is loyal. Successful confident guys think if you admit you want love it makes you weak or desperate....but to me it just shows I am human.
I found out this past October my ex boyfriend had been cheating on me over the summer and gave me HIV. It has been an interesting journey so far."
So I don't doubt that this type of infection happens often or a lot, but something is fishy about these confessional profiles. First of all, they are on a pretty hard fast moving cut and dry hook up site (guess which), but aside from that I've always found this whole 'I got it from an unfaithful bf' thing to have this sort of grace about it that seems like a bunch of horse crap. Like if it happened to you in this manner then you are indeed a true victim and not gross like everyone else who got it some other way. It actually makes me appreciate people who got it drugged up in an anonymous unsafe gang bangs much more. I mean come on, nobody got it from sitting on a church pew. Well... maybe. In a way, the irresponsibility of the bf load taker is more deep seeded (sorry) and psychologically screwed up on a long term basis because they were having unsafe sex with someone for some time under the safety net of just monogamy alone, which is way weaker than latex. I just don't buy it. These boo-hoo-bf situations (if fabricated) seem to relieve the newly infected from all the things about hiv which our society still can't let go of: reckless pleasure, drug use and a general uncleaaaaaaaaaaan...
I'll try and make my posts a little cheerier in the near future.