Thursday, March 5, 2009


In obscure and poorly written mythology, "God", after creaming almost all sentient beings on the planet with a flood (like an adolescent), had second thoughts and remorse about His wrathful and violent act. He promised never to do it again and that the symbol of this promise would be the rainbow. The rainbow charmed people for centuries with this tale attached to it (the basic feeling being "Awww, that man that beat me (God) will never ever ever do it again and I have this eye candy to ensure that", good luck with that!)!, but unfortunately the rainbow got out of control, as do most of this God's concepts. So out of control that it became the primary symbol for weak schmaltzy sentiment, climaxing in the unfortunate choice by the Gays of a rainbow flag (the diversity symbolism is great, but oof what an ugly flag!). Then one day this very lazy (I can't stress this aspect about Him enough), judgmental, vindictive and mostly absent God flipped out and his promise went bananas and his rage towards all of us became so enormous that his rainbow went ballistic and his promise became a huge nuclear disaster, momentarily setting fire to everything in it's path before turning it to ash. So if you do indeed see this sight above, remember that you can enjoy this Hallmark card moment briefly and can even do shadow puppets on the wall - they'll be there longer than you!

I don't know what this story meant or where it came from, but I tried to end it quickly as it swerved all over the place.

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