Friday, January 30, 2009

JEAN HARLOW IS EVERYWHERE


This is a terrible copy of the new Nip/Tuck ad. I was initially impressed by their Frankenstein style Jean Harlow recreation, but now the ad is virtually on every single thing in the city and I've been able to take a closer look. They really did a great job, especially in not making her another version of our current popular mode of beauty ; she's really a Jean Harlow. "Dinner at Eight" was on TCM (the WORST pre-show hosts in the world, by the way. Rose McGowan?! I'm not going to get into her plastic clipped pony tail while she presents a high glamour classic silver screen gala film. The fact of the matter is she just doesn't know anything and it's terrible) and my friend and I were texting each other through the movie. She said that every actress playing a female bit part in the movie, from Jean's maid to the cashier, was more attractive than Jean. I told her Archie Bunker was more attractive that Jean. Little did my friend know the true roots of her currently nuked bleach blond hair: As a result of Jean Harlow's platinum bob, countless numbers of American women went bald. Women have been burning their heads off to be blonde ever since. The original Harlow...


About this Nip/Tuck show. I don't watch it. I actually don't like most drama or television programming or movies. Everyone is cruel and shallow, there's thrilling violence which most people thoughtlessly love to gawk at (the violent act usually being the apex of almost all programming, something the viewer would feel shortchanged for not getting) and most characters run around in petty fear with meddlesome aspirations. Someone took me aside to tell me his plastic surgery dreams and hopes (yawn) hoping he might save money on a consultation fee talking to me. He said he wanted a little nip/tuck around his neck and jawline. I shuddered. We don't call it that - how gross. If you must, then say 'some work', but it's perfectly easy to say you want to take some 'time off' and go into what you would like to have done. Spare me the details of your blood and guts.
"Spare me your anatomy!" -Mary Vivian Pierce in "Female Trouble"

No comments: